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Where the $@*% is the Army of Gardeners? Get Off Your Duffs and Make A Difference – Feed the Hungry With Your Lawn

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Garden Rant AwardIn 2009 I created this particular post as a guest writer for Garden Rant, one of my absolute favorite garden blog spots. It garnered a lot of attention, in fact, I won the #2 spot for “Hottest Garden Blog of 2009” and they gave me this amazing badge to place on my blogs. Thanks, Garden Ranters! I was also cursed, called a nazi, yelled at, and called various names by the comment ranters.

I’m very proud I got called a “lawn-nazi” for the write-up as well. Why? Because I still stand beside the idea that feeding the hungry is better than growing grass any day! Below is the rant – republished for your enjoyment. Feel free to leave YOUR comment and let me know how you feel too. Happy 2010!

Shawna's front lawn veggie garden.

Do you know what ticks me off royally?

Churches, synagogues, temples, and businesses of every sort! Shocking, isn’t it? And let’s make this clear they tick me off because in every community across the United States you can find these organizations AND MORE displaying acre after acre after expansive acre of grass with no real gardeners doing a thing about it. Where’s an Army of Gardeners when we need one?

Lousy, useless, non-sustainable grass is pretty much good for nothing. The grass is the enemy. Face it: grass sucks! No literally, grass sucks a tremendous amount of chemicals which are bad for our water aquifers and sucks good old-fashioned water which is good for… well… staying alive.

I mean, c’mon people use your common sense. Let me spell it out. With the nation’s population projected to increase to 392 million by 2050 combined with a down global economy where many cities across the United States alone are seeing over 11% unemployment rates – we are in trouble.

It is not the responsibility of the government to solve every problem we have. Get off your duffs and build your community. No one else is going to do it for you. Here’s how you get started – first, get rid of all that useless grass that’s sucking our most precious resource. Encourage your businesses, churches, neighborhoods, non-profits – and most importantly – your family to start planting vegetables like they are going out of style.

Here’s a real shocker – vegetables are going out of style. Food around the world is being rationed. With the Global Warming Crisis causing weather changes and crops to fail around the world, this is no longer something we should be ignoring.

It’s difficult to conquer all the grass in the world. However, I have chosen to set an example for my Army comrades. Without regret, I have ripped out my front lawn and planted the damndest little veggie garden you have ever seen (in part-shade no less). Guess what? It’s growing just fine and so far I have donated over a hundred pounds of veggies to the local food pantry.

If you cannot plant vegetables, plant a Therapeutic Garden. Cancer, diabetes, and heart disease rates are skyrocketing. Why not plant a useful garden which might encourage your community to be healthier? By planting more gardens you are also preventing crime in your neighborhoods. Let’s see… hmmm… what are the benefits? Stronger mental and physical health, reduced crime, and fresh organic veggies for your neighborhood. Seems like a win-win to me.

Never has the world needed an army of gardeners as it does now. Come to attention! Build a neighborhood garden, grow extra veggies to share, help your community now because without your help some of your neighbors might not be able to weather these difficult economic times.

Grab your pitchforks, hoes, and rotted manure! It is time we made a difference!

Shawna Lee Coronado is an author, locally syndicated newspaper columnist, blogger, and greening expert focused on teaching and living a green lifestyle. Photo by Shawna of her front-yard veg garden.

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  1. Great rant!! I have been mulling over the idea of taking up some of the lawn our backyard (my mom would just kill me if part of her front lawn went missing. But we have a 1/4 acre in our backyard that's pretty much up for grabs…hmmm!

    This is why I share all my garden thoughts on my blog with hopes that someone will see that GREEN will make you HAPPY!

    Keep on spreading the word – people are listening and owe you lunch for all the money you have saved them in 'doctor' bills!

  3. I'm inspired to work towards replacing the grass in our front yard with veggies/herbs/native plants, but I don't think I have the resources to do it all at once. Do you have any recommendations for how to undertake a gradual conversion?

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